What is My Purpose?

How am I supposed to be strong when nobody is willing to help me?  In less that 3 months I will be considered an adult and, I know I am not ready. Because my mind frame is somewhere completely off track, its in the clouds I think. I've asked more than one person to help me, they all keep denying me help... I need help.

 I recently removed someone who was a big part in my life for a very long time. We had different ideas of what a "FRIEND" should be. I don't feel bad that I cut her out of my life. But I miss her with all my might. I don't want to be friends with her though not again. . . not this time.

I also recently lost my Great Grandmother I wasn't close to her but I loved her. I was the bell of the ball in her eyes.

 I feel alone like everything is leaving me. I don't know who I am I don't know who I'm supposed to be. I just want to do nothing but sleep.  I want to be able to close my eyes and never wake up. I guess I want to be like Sleeping Beauty minus the beauty part.  Or the Part where the prince comes in and kisses her on the lips and she wakes up. That whole scene can disappear can I can be asleep forever.

Sometimes I wonder why I was born, what was the point? To make me feel all this pain, all this suffering, what is my purpose?